Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states
that we have to go through. Where people fail is
that
they
wish to elect a state and remain in it.
This is a kind of death.
- Anais Nin
Honoring Natural Cycles of Change and
Transition
In times of painful or difficult transition, it is easy to forget that our
need for challenge and growth is as inherent as our need for food. From
the minute we are born, we enjoy exploring and learning new things. As
soon as we have reached a certain sense of mastery in one area, we move on
to the next developmental task despite the fact that we will at first
fumble and stumble at attempting the new skill.
The transition from leaving a comfortable
state of satisfaction and mastery to one of uncertainty, challenge, and
risk occurs throughout our life span. It seems to be a vital ingredient
to feeling alive and invigorated. Our creative spark and life energy are
fueled by the friction and chemistry that exists between certainty and
uncertainty, safety and risk, the known and the unknown, routine and
adventure, and the loss and gain that we consciously or unconsciously
experience every moment of the day as evolving beings.
The right balance between stability and
change differs not only from individual to individual, but also from
culture to culture. Because of the many opportunities for growth inherent
in transition and loss, many ancient earth-based cultures “artificially”
and periodically challenge the mind, body, and spirit through fasting,
shamanic journeys, isolated meditation, vision quests, and other rites of
passage. These ancient spiritual traditions are based on the premise that
learning to let go and embrace our changing nature, much like the seasons
of the earth, is necessary to realign us with life-enforcing earth wisdom,
energies, and rhythms.
Our contemporary world, in contrast, has
increasingly placed more value on technological advances that enable us to
predict and control more and more of our natural world and life style. We
forget that the safety and illusion of mastery and stability can block our
access to creative adaptation, freedom, and innate strengths, stifling our
spiritual growth in the long run. When our focus shifts from our inner
compass to outward success defined by careers, power, money, possessions,
and an avoidance of all growing pains and discomfort, we often respond
with symptoms of anxiety, depression, addiction, and emptiness. Natural
cycles, dips, and role shifts may lead to feelings of incompetence,
worthlessness, failure, and intense stress. A vicious cycle may
develop when we try to beat these feelings by responding more frantically
to external demands instead of making inner changes that support us.
Instead of dreading times of transition and/or feeling stuck in
dysfunctional patterns, it is possible to learn how to welcome the ebb and
flow of positive and negative changes unique to your life and the rich
time for inner work that they provide. They allow for self-exploration, an
opportunity to conquer nameless fears, and a chance to reconnect with your
boundless, wise self. To resist these natural life-death cycles of
change is to deny yourself and the world the gifts of the transitional
process -- to emerge from the temporary fog with a deeper appreciation for
your most sacred self and powerful connection to the ways of the earth.
Learn to get in touch with silence within yourself
and
know that everything in this life has a purpose.
-
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross
